Happy Valentine's Day! This is not my favorite holiday, but I have learned to embrace it by sharing my Valentine's Day humiliating stories. You can read my other Valentines failures here.
I carefully wrote out my Valentine and anxiously anticipated what Valentine's Day would bring me. According to my BFF, Jamie received 26 roses from admirers, apparently I wasn't the only one in love with him. As fate would have it, my card was the first that he opened. He read my card out loud to his friend, "Happy Valentine's Day! I like you, as more than just friends. Love, Wendy Larter"
He looked at his friend with a puzzled look on his face and said, "Wendy Larter? Who's that?"
Then his friend chuckled, "Wendy Larter? Larter Farter!" Jamie and his friend burst out in laughter and made spontaneous fart noises while high fiving each other for their poetic brillance.
At that moment I vowed to hate my parents forever for having a last name that rhymes with Farter. Tell me I'm not the only one who had a hopeless crush who never knew you existed, until they figured out that your last name rhymes with a bodily function.