Remembering Mom

One year ago, I lost my mom to breast cancer.  In some ways it feels like yesterday and in other ways it feels like a million years ago.  I miss her so incredibly much it physically hurts sometimes, even though some days she made me crazy.   I would give anything to hear her say, “Why don’t you put on some lipstick before we go out?”  She couldn’t stand that I didn’t wear lipstick when I left the house. 

I completely underestimated the ripple effects of my mom’s loss.  Her loss has left a gaping hole in my family.  There are so many times I reach for the phone to call her and feel that pang of, “oh, that’s right she is gone.”

But I am okay… well.. I'm going to be okay.  She promised me that I would be okay one day, and I cling to that promise, after all "Mother knows best."  Those days that I miss her the most, I am incredibly lucky there is a wide support system of people ready to lend an ear.  My neighbors who have raised their own families, have filled in as grandma’s to my kids and given me advice.  My friends and even their mom’s have lent an ear to provide their support. 

This is hard, and I didn’t want to do this… but I am going to be okay.  Today I’m going to celebrate the life that she lived.